Me, Myself & I

Just like the Beyonce song says, you only have yourself in the end. You cannot lean on anyone else to help you along. It sounds so dramatic and those that "know me" would say it too. But no matter how many times I reach out to friends or try to get into a relationship it always ends up badly. And ultimately it comes back on me, it gets blamed on my forward personality. As I've grown up I've tried to temper my tongue and I feel like I've gotten better, but those who've known me the whole time still take small outbursts as me going back to my old ways. It's unfair but it's how things go, and it hurts me to the core. I wish there was just one person who could see who I really am, that I may have a past that has mistakes in it, but I am trying to get better. I keep reaching out to people only to get burned by one mistake. I need to go somewhere new, where nobody knows what I was like before. Then maybe I would be okay. But as long as I stay here where everyone knows every part of the past 6 years of my life I'm going to get hurt. Each time I get hurt I get a little piece of my strength taken away. My strength is the only thing holding me together...so when it goes what will happen to me.